Why Conversation Is the Most Effective Recruitment Strategy in Foster Care and Adoption

Why Conversation Is the Most Effective Recruitment Strategy in Foster Care and Adoption

We are asking families to make one of the most meaningful decisions of their lives – whether to foster or, ultimately adopt a child, through email.

The most effective way to recruit foster and adoptive families is through direct, meaningful conversation rather than email or passive outreach. Research shows that person-to-person communication builds trust, increases commitment, and leads to stronger matches and better long-term outcomes for children and families. [1][2]

Within child welfare, we often see that we have unintentionally built a recruitment system that prioritizes efficiency over understanding. But foster care and adoption through foster care are not transactional decisions. They are deeply human ones. We are asking families to make one of the most meaningful decisions of their lives, whether to foster or, ultimately, adopt a child, and the most ineffective method has proven to be through email, often our #1 means of communication. 

If we want better outcomes for children, we have to change how we engage families.

It starts with a simple shift: We have to start talking to them.

What Is Foster Care and Adoption Recruitment?

Foster care and adoption recruitment is often described as the process of identifying and engaging families who are willing to open their homes to children in need. But in practice, it can  become a system of forms, emails, and one-directional communication. Families inquire online, receive follow-up emails, and are asked to absorb large amounts of information without ever being truly known.

This approach may generate interest, but it does not generate understanding. And without understanding, it is difficult – if not impossible – to make the kinds of thoughtful, stable matches that children need. Recruitment, at its best, is not about filling a pipeline. It is about beginning a relationship.

Why Conversation Is More Effective Than Email in Recruitment

The research on communication is clear: conversation is not just more personal, it is more effective. Studies show that face-to-face requests are up to 34 times more successful than those made over email, and individuals are significantly more likely to say yes when asked directly rather than through text-based communication. [1][2] At the same time, nearly 90% of workplace misunderstandings originate through email, highlighting how easily intention and tone can be lost. [3]

At Let It Be Us we offer foster parent recruitment events for some of the most successful Child Welfare Agencies in Illinois and while we host some of these events as webinars, we also host these events in person. This allows us to form relationships with our recruits which, in turn, allows us to understand their capacities and goals. Some in-person events are held at the agencies we partner with and some are held at restaurants, libraries and civic centers. Learn about all of our foster home recruitment events here: www.letitbeus.org/events. 

Relationships matter deeply in child welfare, where the decisions being made are complex, emotional, and life-altering. Email strips away nuance. It removes the ability to clarify, to respond in real time, and to build trust. Research confirms that text-based communication often leads to misinterpretation, particularly in situations that require emotional understanding. [4] In contrast, live conversation – whether in person or by phone – allows for connection, responsiveness, and shared understanding. It remains the gold standard for communication, especially when the stakes are high. [5]

Why Conversation Matters in Foster Care Recruitment

Foster care and adoption are not transactional decisions. They are deeply human commitments that require reflection, honesty, and support. When we rely solely on forms or emails, we reduce families to categories – checkboxes indicating preferences or limitations. But families are far more complex than that.

Through conversation, something different happens. We begin to understand not just what families say they want, but why. We hear their motivations, their concerns, and their hopes. We learn about their strengths, their capacities, and the areas where they may need support or additional preparation. We are able to ask follow-up questions, offer guidance, and help families think more deeply about what fostering or adopting truly means.

This is where recruitment shifts – from a process to a relationship.

How Conversations Improve Matching and Permanency

When recruitment is grounded in conversation, matching becomes more precise. Families are not simply matched based on availability; they are matched based on alignment. Expectations are clearer from the beginning, and support needs are identified earlier.

This leads to more stable placements, fewer disruptions, and stronger pathways to permanency. We know from research and practice that instability in foster care can have lasting negative effects on children, making the quality of the initial match critically important. When we take the time to understand families, we increase the likelihood that placements will succeed – not just in the moment, but over time.

Real Impact: Families Evolve Through Conversation

One of the most powerful aspects of conversation-based recruitment is that families grow through the process. It is not uncommon for families to begin with a very specific idea of what they are willing to consider – often saying they are only interested in adoption.

But through thoughtful, respectful conversation, something shifts. As families learn more, ask questions, and hear real examples, they begin to expand their thinking. They may become open to fostering first, to supporting reunification, or to considering children they had not previously imagined. This transformation does not happen through automated emails or static information sessions. It happens when someone takes the time to listen, to guide, and to engage in a genuine dialogue.

Best Practices for Foster Care Recruitment

If we accept that conversation is central to effective recruitment, then our practices must reflect that. Recruitment should prioritize early, meaningful engagement with families, creating space for dialogue rather than simply delivering information. Email and digital tools still have a role to play, but they should support – not replace – human connection. Staff should be equipped not only with information, but with the skills to listen, to ask thoughtful questions, and to build trust over time.

Most importantly, recruitment should be child-centered. Conversations should help uncover how a family’s unique strengths align with the specific needs of children waiting for permanency, rather than treating all inquiries as equal or interchangeable.

The Future of Recruitment in Child Welfare

The future of foster care and adoption recruitment will not be defined by how many families we reach, but by how well we understand the families who respond. Systems that continue to rely on transactional outreach will struggle to produce stable, lasting outcomes. Those that invest in relational engagement – grounded in conversation – will be better positioned to create meaningful, lasting matches.

This shift requires intention. It requires time. But it also offers the greatest opportunity for change.

Conclusion

Conversation is not an added step in recruitment – it is the foundation. It is how trust is built, how understanding is developed, and how readiness is assessed. When we take the time to truly engage with families, we do more than recruit. We create the conditions for successful placements and lasting permanency.

And ultimately, that is what children need most.

References

[1] Bohns, V. (Harvard Business Review). A face-to-face request is 34 times more successful than an email.
[2] Roghanizad & Bohns (2017). In-person requests significantly outperform email requests.
[3] Forbes (2023). 90% of workplace misunderstandings originate via email.
[4] Pollmann et al. (2025). Text-based communication increases misinterpretation.
[5] Stieger et al. (2023). Face-to-face communication as the “gold standard.”

About Let It Be Us:
Let It Be Us is a nonprofit organization dedicated to recruitment, matching and placement within foster care and adoption across the State of Illinois. Through innovative programming and strategic partnerships, Let It Be Us aims to improve outcomes for children in the child welfare system. Learn more at www.letitbeus.org.

Dr. Susan A. McConnell, DSW, MBA

Dr. Susan A. McConnell is the Founder and Executive Director of Let It Be Us, an Illinois licensed child welfare agency with the mission of providing collaborative, innovative solutions of effective recruitment and placement within Illinois foster care and adoption. Susan has an MBA from DePaul University and a Doctorate Degree in Social Work from the University of Southern California, where her work focused on permanency within child welfare.  She is the Chair of the Permanency Committee of the Illinois Statewide Foster Care Advisory Council, appointed by the Director of the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services (DCFS) in 2017. She is also an adoptive parent with over 30 years of open adoption experience. She can be reached at susanmcconnell@letitbeus.org.

Let It Be Us is an Illinois 501(c)3 and licensed child welfare agency. The mission of Let It Be Us is to provide collaborative, innovative solutions of effective recruitment and placement within Illinois foster care and adoption. The Let It Be Us platform manages the Adoption Listing Service of Illinois and the Heart Gallery of Illinois, engines of success for Illinois foster care adoptions. The Let It Be Us vision is for all children in the Illinois child welfare system to achieve educational equity, employment equity, and overall well being through the incorporation of Let It Be Us Programming into statewide advancements in foster care and adoption recruitment and placement. For more information about Let It Be Us, visit www.letitbeus.org.